Wednesday, June 8, 2011

My Hero....

My hero right now would definitely have to be my mom's friend Elisa. She has been through so much crap and yet, she always has a smile on her face and she accepts what life throws at her, no matter what it is. I just finished reading her book, "The Golden Sky". In it, she talks about being nineteen and pregnant, having people staring at her and Ruby all the time, then about when she found out that her baby was a boy. Zeke, her son, was born with a lot of problems; a cleft lip, a hernia, all his organs in his chest and other things. I think that she's an amazing woman because if it were my kid, I would never be able to deal with all of that. Although both her and her husband found it very hard to cope with when Zeke died, she somehow made it through and still managed to have a smile on her face most of the time, even though it was hard not to cry sometimes. I cry a lot about my cousin Connor still and he's not my kid. If I had a kid born with a lot of problems and he/she died only a short while after being born, I think I would break down into depression and I wouldn't be able to come out of it. Elisa is a very strong woman in my opinion, even if she doesn't think she is. She was able to hold out, even when she and her husband had some marital problems. I don't think I could handle both my kid's death AND marital problems at the same time. Life isn't fair, I can accept that, but I don't know if I could handle all of that bull all at once. I now understand that even though I have problems with life sometimes, that I'm lucky that I'm not having to deal with the death of a kid like Elisa. I wouldn't be strong enough for that. I wouldn't even be able to handle having a kid right now in the first place. Elisa now holds a very special place in my heart and I hope and pray that she'll keep being strong and that I hope Zeke likes his pet skunk and balloon in heaven. :) Love ya, Elisa! :D